Mouthing Off, It's the Coffee's Fault

hello friday! hello depression!

1) commuters are such sheep! we have more cars on our subway trains now and there is a man shouting at us to move down towards the extra cars so we can get seats and we all just stare at him like he's a puppet there to entertain us. *blink* *blink* *blink* and then one guy starts shuffling. and we all start shuffling a little bit. one after the other. not really sure where we're headed.

2) i keep having morbid thoughts. about how my subway train is going to explode one day or some escalator i'm on has a bomb planted on it. and then, i think about what i should be thinking about right before i go. and what i'm grateful for. yada yada yada. these things don't come announced, you know. and to top it all off, terrorists, the main source of my worries, sometimes i kind of understand what it must be like in their heads. and don't get me started on the troops. i have massive guilt complexes surrounding why they're where they are and i am where i am.

the president of iran, if i didn't know who he was, would strike me as one of those shy guys who is a really really good guy if you just gave him a chance:

ah well, the world will throw a curveball every once in awhile.

***

you know you're eating a powerful peach when you have some chocolate, and then the peach and the peach is still hella succulently sweet. now that's one powerful peach. it's a white peach. luckily not a white supremacist peach or i will be feeling some burning in my stomach...right about...NOW. nope. i'm good.

yay. we got t-shirts for our internship. as usual, mine can be used as a sleeping bag instead of a shirt. that's ok. i will just sew up the bottom and the sleeves, and enlarge the neck and voila. i can move out of my parents' house into the backyard all cozy comfy in my 100% cotton insulation public funded r&r sack. and i was complaining about no salary, i am so ungrateful.

***

of course i drink coffee with bonus extra credit shots of espresso when i don't actually have to work so my eyes can roll around in my head during meetings and i can pant at people (yes, pant, like a dog) and i can nod my head spastically when people are talking to me and then start talking over them instead of listening to what they are saying and then get really nervous and paranoid because i didn't even need coffee today. i got more than enough sleep but i really like this jittery jittery jittery hyperbolic aparnamonstermachine. time to GO HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i am going to a black people club tonight. THAT IS WHAT MY FRIEND CALLED IT. sometimes i cannot believe people's bluntness (including my own). i mean i know what she meant to say. and this is what she exactly said "it is a black people club. so you know it will actually have good music and dancing." sooooo. yeah. the issue of race is weird. it weirds me out. but it's so in your face in this city that you cannot not talk about it. goobity goobity. i feel like just standing around flapping my lips with my finger. sometimes that's easier than actually saying anything within the lines of acceptability to everybody.