but look. he's younger than me, so consider it a maternal instinct.
TYSON RITTER -- frontman for ALL-AMERICAN REJECTS
BEFORE

i'm smiling with health!
AFTER

help! my kissable cheeks are sinking into my alluring face!
i'm fretting. his eyes look hungry. for heroin? for cheez-its? i don't even know. don't let him end up on E!: True Hollywood Story like the rest of 'em. just 70 cents a day and you can download his songs without piracy.

be careful, pooks!
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